March

Lionel Asbo … Not for the faint-hearted

The end of this book was almost a blur because I felt so nervous – the tension had been building for sooooo long that I don’t know if I took the words in properly. Martin Amis has a wonderful style, very raw, and Lionel Asbo has to be one of the most … ahhhh … distasteful characters ever to be immortalised on paper.

I haven’t read much of Amis before so when I saw Lionel Asbo: State of England I thought why not? Reading the front and back covers made it sound quite funny. And it was! But it was also very, very chilling. Because I’m sure there are many real Lionel Asbos out there in the world, not just in England.

He’s a thug and petty criminal, who, in a fit of rage, makes someone disappear. In prison, on completely unrelated charges, he wins a fortune in the national lottery. Once he’s out, a reporter and photographer pretty much follow his every move – his new lifestyle and old personality are perfect tabloid fodder. He never thinks to help his large, struggling family with any cash and crashes his way through life with his own sense of what’s right and wrong.

Yes, his nephew and other main character, Desmond, does do something that 99.9% of the population would consider to be very, very wrong. But Lionel’s version of justice keeps you on tenterhooks right to the end. What will he do to Desmond?

I can’t say too much, other than if you’re looking for a bit of a laugh with a sinister undertone, this could be the perfect story. If you’re into civility, decorum and being nice to dogs, then this could be totally wrong.

Have you ever had one of those moments when you think, “Why didn’t I do that earlier?” Today’s walk on a new path very close to our house was a slap-myself-on-the-forehead situation. Three years I’ve been here … three years.

Normally when I go walking in the neighbourhood, I go out onto the main road, turn left up through a patch of trees then turn right into some fields. Rene, our neighbour, took us on a nighttime drive after dinner two Fridays ago and showed us another walking path near the house – instead of turning right, walk a bit further then turn left.

What a revelation! We live near a creek! I had no idea running water was so close. It’s at the bottom of the deep ravine behind our house. I’ve never walked into the forest and down the ravine because it’s too steep, and had no idea this mystery ‘path to the left’ led to this little wonder. It’s totally lifted my spirits, knowing there’s a whole new area to discover and enjoy in summer. I envisage picnic packing, feet cooling, deer spotting, silence appreciating good times ahead.

Enough with the talk – here are the photos! We walked for 80 minutes in total, and I’m so in love with this new path I’m going to be doing it regularly. It’s steep, but walking towards Wohlen means most of it’s downhill. Maybe when I’m fit enough, I can run the opposite direction and have a killer hill just before home?

Hopefully the pictures do it justice and you can see, and feel, my excitement about having this formerly unknown area to us both literally (and I use that term in its correct sense) in our backyard. *smacks forehead in disbelief*

Wishing you a wonderful day.

: After turning left on the main road from our driveway, we walk up through this section of forest

: The biggest one felled in the pile. It smelt delicious. Thank you tree!

: Normally we turn right here (I’m standing on the road) but instead we walked on

: And here’s the left turn into Luggliweg. I’ve never walked down this short road before

: The path divides into a Y shape – the right part leads to a house. That’s the mailbox

: We walked along the left arm of the Y

: There were lots of snowy patches still on this path because of shadow from the trees

: Through these trees, across the ravine, is our house (and the garages)

: Leo leads the way down the wide path. Because I stop to take so many photos, he ends up a long way ahead

: We drove down this path at night with Rene and Liliane. It was a revelation again to see it in daylight

: Tall trees and a little green man

: It felt like we were in an enchanted forest

: We know there are deer because sometimes they come onto our lawn

: From little things, big things grow. Next year’s Christmas trees?

: Is that a little creek?! What the?! We had no idea it ran through here

: This deeper part of the creek could be a great place to sit in summer

: I wonder how fast this creek will flow when all the surrounding snow has completely melted …

: My new favourite tree, right by the river, on a flat part of ground. Bring on summer! I want to sit there!

: The creek takes a windy path and offers many flat areas to wade in the water

: This deeper hole looks like what remains after a tree’s fallen

: This is an accidental out-of-focus photo of my red glove … but it’s pretty cool, don’t you think?

: This is where it started to rain

: The local kindergarten uses this hut for adventurous outdoor day trips

: Another angle of the hut

: The first sign of civilisation (not counting the hut), after walking about 50 minutes

: Not sure how much sun they get here, with that hill, but the houses were very cute

: We thought this cluster of houses was pretty cute

: The house down by the creek would be cold I think! The creek runs into the Wohlensee

: An entertaining area belonging to one of the houses. Perfect in summer

: Now this was a surprise! An elaborately decorated garden

: The house also had an exhibition area for the public. They’re quite the artistic types!

: This Frosty won’t be melting any time soon

: Like a bird …

: … on a wire. (Oh Leonard!) Love the one who’s doing his own thing

: This house was also well decorated … with Easter bunnies!

: Taking the back path into Wohlen via our favourite restaurant

: The large outdoor play area at Restaurant Kreuz is great for kids in summer

: Someone enjoying the swing ride. It had stopped raining by now

: A little bit of country in the … country. A club for horseshoe throwers. Must come and try!

: Plenty of horseshoe throwing places makes me think there’s a right ol’ competition going on in summer

: We stopped off at Restaurant Kreuz for a softdrink and ran into …

: … our neighbour Rene. He was pleased we’d walked the path he’d recently shown us

: We’re nearly home! Looking down into Wohlen

: A study in cow, grain silo and wood at one of the nearby farmhouses

: The road home (our complex is in the distance) looks a bit different now that most of the snow has melted. And that’s the end of today’s tour

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fitfor15in15 … and further

I once tried to get fit for 2015 in a minimum of 15 minutes a day, and now I just write about stuff

Lionel Asbo: State of England by Martin Amis

March 1: My new favourite walk!